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February 27, 2022

Should We Learn to Say No?

Have you ever been in a dilemma where you need to choose between saying ‘no’ and losing an opportunity? Or ‘yes’ and denying your values? Learning to say no is undoubtedly a tough decision, but it can save you a lot of stress. For instance, gambling can be addictive. And except you have rare access to free options like free spiny, you may end up losing all your funds and getting bankrupt. Nobody likes the sound of that.

Before making a decision you dislike, let’s first discuss other considerations apart from your current dilemma. Let’s start with your goals. Does this offer align with your plan, or will it thwart it in the long run? Nobody loves a complicated life. And by choosing a path contrary to your goals, you create extra options for yourself. This won’t arise if you set your priority straight. It’s called ‘keeping your eyes on the ball.’ It will keep you in check and help you say no at the right time and for the right season.

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Consider the stress it would involve upfront. Are you overcommitting yourself? Consider the resources, energy, and time you commit to this task. Afterwards, ask yourself if it’s worth it. What’s the fastest way to invite stress? Here’s your answer: Agreeing to do things that are not convenient, stretching yourself to your elastic limit. And going against your principles. So before you make promises, commit yourself or accept an offer, ask yourself how much stress you can tolerate.

Another consideration is your dignity and self-respect. If saying yes would threaten those, then you should probably say no. It’s that simple. Also, you don’t want to make promises you won’t keep; you won’t earn people’s trust. You don’t always have to force yourself to deal with negativity or toxicity at all times. If saying yes would mean dealing with that for an extended period. 

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Think about your mental/ psychological health. Do yourself some good and walk away. It’s a practical way of saying ‘no’ to negativity. But why do you sometimes say yes when you actually mean no? There are several reasons. For instance, you might want to avoid an awkward situation. Or you think a ‘no’ would mean offending the person. And you don’t want that. How about you consider the damage it would cost you or both of you in the long run?

Here are a few strategies for learning to say ‘no’ when yes is a bad idea. Develop a firm conviction about your principles. Being convinced about what makes up your boundaries is essential. Confidence helps you stick to your goals regardless of what anyone throws at you. 

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So how do you say no to a request without sounding rude? Take a deep breath and be calm; use the most polite sentence your mind can offer. And while you’re at it, be gentle but assertive.  Finally, let your yes remain so and if your choice is no, stick to it!

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